My name is Brian. I am a psychology student at Middlesex University. I am really dedicated to studying psychology and I believe it to be my passion. But recently, I have been getting a really scary thought. I am overweight. And I am not physically good looking. Basically, I am fat. I am scared if I won’t be employed because of me being overweight. Or if people won’t come to me because I am fat. So, I wanted to ask you, does working in a psychological field means you have to be in good shape?
I believe that your concern about being overweight translates your hidden low self-confidence. You are afraid that people will judge you by your physical appearance and not by who you are as a person. You have a hidden desire to impress people, a desire to be a good person. In psychology, this is called a good boy syndrome, also known as a savior syndrome. The desire to become a psychologist might also be part of the syndrome. This is the desire to help people and also the desire to be important and valued by others. Same as the desire to become a doctor, a firefighter, or a police officer.
The insecurity that comes from being overweight reflects the fear of rejection. Perhaps, there is a real story in your childhood when your parents or other kids laughed at you or rejected you because of your weight. I highly recommend you learn more about “Good Boy Syndrome” and work with your childhood trauma. You need to heal your relationships with your parents.
In 99% of cases, people who are looking for acceptance and appreciation were criticized a lot in their childhood. They didn’t receive enough love, care, and support from their parents.
Once they grow up, they are transferring those feelings to other people around them and trying to subconsciously recreate the situation from their childhood to resolve their internal conflict and find a satisfying outcome.
Usually, this does not work, because people are looking for a parental type of love and support. No one can give it to them, even their own adult parents. The past is the past. You cannot change it, but you can heal your emotional wounds by going to therapy.
Here is some information for you to start your healing process:
1. Why good boys fall for bad girls:
2. Desire to help others:
3. Stop being “Nice”:
4. Online course “Weight Loss Vaccine”
(A healing online course to work on your emotional trauma so you will not suppress it with food):
5. Online course “Program Yourself for Success”
(Reprogram your mind for success and overcome your limiting beliefs):
6. Online private sessions with me: